My client just showed me this video after I showed him the Barstool Philly video of the dude getting trucked by the car he was yelling at. I have to say what really did it for me was the shoe coming off at the end. Enjoy.
Posts Tagged ‘stupid’
Road Rage
Thursday, March 3rd, 2011Dumb Computer
Wednesday, March 2nd, 2011So, its the computer that is stupid? Not you right?
Dancing in Traffic for the Loss
Tuesday, August 3rd, 2010Idiot guy dances in traffic, hilarity ensues. I’m blatantly stealing this from barstoolsports but it isn’t often that a video makes me actually “lol” and this one did. I’m assuming he isn’t dead, even seriously injured I’d probably still be okay laughing at him. Anyway, I’ll go on the assumption that he is fine, and enjoy the hell out of this video. Nothing makes me happier than seeing stupidity actually lose out except combining that with bodily injury. I’m going to go watch this six more times now.
BP Spills Coffee
Tuesday, June 15th, 2010BP is having a meeting at their office, and an innocent coffee spill has devastating results due to stupidity, inaction and lack of resources.
Thanks to Wonn for the link.
Email from Andy: Vigilant. Always Vigilant.
Tuesday, June 8th, 2010Please click here before reading the following.
[the above link is broken because Apple bought LaLa, the original music is in the video below]
So, in the harsh chill of early morning, some idiot bird smashes beak-first into the side of a ten story building and drops, listlessly to the sidewalk below, where it lays, stunned, all but certain to die.
But, somehow, it doesn’t.
Through some miraculous twist of fate, it clings to its meaningless life just long enough for three (equally idiotic) humans from my office to discover its dwindling-corpse on their way to smash beak-first into a box of donuts.
Putting their glossy heads together, these three mongoloids decide that they cannot conceivably allow this broken-winged simpleton to simply pass on. “No,” they bellow from beneath pillowy, crumb-coated jaws, “we must save it!” A noble endeavor, to be certain.
Scooping the crumpled pocket of bacteria into a rough wad of paper towels, and ignoring the basic responsibilities of their employment, the tard-triplets rush the fading creature to a local animal emergency room, which, by happenstance, is also a veterinary college.
“Save this bird,” they squeal, as if at the height of their own self-righteous orgasms. “Dammit, doctor, there’s no time!”
Confused and unimpressed, first responders humor the mentally-deficient three, pretending to rush the wild, over-populated bird into surgery at the expense of legitimate animals and actual emergencies. The odds are stacked against the poor invalid, but doctors are doing everything they can, rest assured. The three leave, hoping against hope that they got there in time. Hoping that perhaps a higher power is on their side.
When they get around to it, the triumvirate returns to the office, to the scene of the trauma. They are met with a heroes welcome… that they give themselves between enthusiastic pats on the back. While those around them toil and grind at their pitiless jobs, the magnificent three stare to the icy heavens, to the billowing clouds, knowing that today, they saved a life. They are lifesavers. They save.
In the depths of their soul they know that should the mighty bird pull through, should the college student operating on it with the expressed intent of developing experience for real-life emergencies succeed, then someday that bird will return to the skies.
Someday, mended, it shall take majestic flight amongst the clouds, where it will be free to soar, to live, to smash its idiot face into a giant fucking inanimate object once again.
And it will. Which is why we must be vigilant. Always vigilant.
Bowl of Stupid
Wednesday, January 20th, 2010Dave asks:
Stadium Fail: Dallas Cowboys
Monday, August 24th, 2009Here is a bit of fail to make your Monday morning better. (at least whatever you screwed up won’t cost someone 2 million dollars.. well, I hope not for your sake. But if it did please tell me about it.)
Apparently when they built the ridiculous new stadium in Dallas, no one bothered to ask the question: is our world’s largest HDTV going to get in the way of some basic elements of a football game?
Punt Hits World’s Largest HD Video Screen in Cowboys Stadium
Andy’s take: “They don’t have planners in Texas, they have doers. And ass kickers.”
Exercise Equipment for Stupid Fat People
Thursday, July 30th, 2009Thanks to Sarah for discovering the new best way to get in shape, instead of maintaining a steady, healthy diet or actually running / playing sports / going to the gym, you can get shake weights! In only six minutes a day you can get into shape! To think, I’ve been spending closer to an hour every day exercising, what a waste! I could be using that time to eat chocolate ice cream, and watch TV! I’m such an idiot! Finally I needn’t waste anymore time, thanks to Sarah pointing me in the direction of this magical device. I already bought ten!
p.s. you know a product is good when its site consists of a single page, with no real details and about 100 “buy here!” links, not to mention the actual purchasing form is on the landing (slash only) page.
p.p.s. as much as this site and product are totally ridiculous, I’m glad things like this exist in the world to extort money from undeserving people. It’s like modern Darwinism, or pretty much the closest thing to it I guess.
Nead $ Pls
Thursday, February 12th, 2009“… interesting facebook story. Last night somebody (presumably in a dimly lit basement internet cafe in China) hacked Mary’s account and asked her friends (specifically, Mikey, who knew it was a scam) to wire her money in Africa (attached is his conversation). Pretty awesome, though it has proven an invaluable albeit unexpected lesson.
I sincerely hope, for your sake, that your travels to China don’t leave you in need of money, because none of us will believe you.”
February 3rd, 2009:
Mary
hi
7:32pmMichael
yo
7:33pmMary
How are you doing
7:33pmMichael
great! i became an uncle today!
7:33pmMary
Wooow
7:34pmMichael
my sister is adopting a child from Peru, and they got all their info today
how are YOU doing
7:34pmMary
Am ok
But not happy
7:35pmMichael
whats wrong?
7:35pmMary
One of my college need my help and i can’t assit her
7:36pmMichael
?
7:36pmMary
She need me to help her send some money and i don’t have enough on me
7:37pmMichael
oh man
that sucsk
do you need to borrow some cash?
7:37pmMary
Yea a lot
Yea can you help me on it
7:38pmMichael
yea absolutley
how much do you need
7:38pmMary
Well i don’t no how much you can help out
how much can you borrow me
7:40pmMichael
would the real Mary Connolly please stand up
7:41pmMary
Am here
7:43pmMary
Michael
talk to me
It was some one you were talking too
Am so sorry my box was hacked
7:44pmMichael
how much money do you need- i can bring it over tomororw
7:45pmMary
don’t come coz amn
not in
7:46pmMichael
ok when will you be home? i’ll come by this weekend with un-marked bills
7:48pmMary
Am out for the week end michael
7:48pmMichael
ok well when should i bring over all this cash?
there’s just so much of it
7:49pmMary
Are you pulling my leg’s micheal
7:49pmMichael
are you pulling mine? ” MARY ”
7:51pmMary
Nope am not
Seem you don’t be live me
7:52pmMichael
alright great
let’s do a wire-transfer
7:52pmMary
So how is your sisiter doing
7:52pmMichael
what is your account number
mine is : 7
7:52pmMary
It as been block am owing the bank some momey
7:53pmMichael
ok so how should we do this
7:53pmMary
Can you go to western union and send it
7:53pmMichael
no problem
7:54pmMary
That would be more easy for you
But you will have to send it to the person i want you to send it too
Micheal if you no you are playing wit me let me no ok
7:55pmMichael
no i am in. who should i send the money to?
7:55pmMary
It’s going to africa
Can you be able to send it there?
And i need you to send it now
7:57pmMichael
ok
i’ll just go to western union and transfer “money” to “africa”
they’ll know just what to do!
8:03pmMichael
well fake Mary, it was nice meeting you. Good luck in Africa and with your financial problems. take care now, bye bye then
