Literally right off the top of my head, there are three things that that would make a fantastic logo and name for:
A search engine (though it probably would only return moderately pertinent results).
A French restaurant.
A twitter/FML-style social networking site designed specifically for messages of mediocrity (my favorite).
My immediate thought was to comment/post it on status updates on Facebook that I thought were completely inane or useless, but I think his ideas are better.
Since I’m low on material these days I’m stealing Andy’s Facebook status update. Enjoy!
Hey kids, it’s me, from the record company. You know who totally gets your sex-crazed teenage angst? Katy Perry does. You know who’s a super hot rebel, who dates the bad boy, and doesn’t care what anyone thinks, just like you? Katy Perry, that’s who. You know who digs singing about Jesus, except when it proves unprofitable? Katy Per-wait, what was that last one?
I always knew the internet was a lot of things, but I NEVER thought anyone would use it with malicious intent. Well, my expectations have been shattered by a website that brings to light how easy it is for someone to stalk you / see when you aren’t home and then steal the things you love.
</sarcasm>
I feel like if you didn’t realize that constantly, publicly, announcing your location was grounds for being robbed raped and pillaged (arrr!) then you are and idiot. I understand there are probably arguments out there against this being an issue, but what it all comes down to is making yourself an easy target. You can say “well people can break in whenever they want” or “if they really want to steal from me they will be able to just see when I leave.” This is true unless you are a CEO, famous athlete, JHM, etc and thus more of a target than a normal person. Outside of fitting into that criteria, why should a person bother to care that other people know their name, address, when they are home, or other things?
Well.. if I am looking for a place to steal shit from, and there are two houses on a block, one with a sign on it that says “no one is home!” and one that has nothing posted.. which one will I go to? Yeah, exactly. A bit of an exaggerated point, but if you narrow your twitter feed, looking for people in a specific region that aren’t home, then use their twitter account to find their facebook, linked in, google account or anywhere else their address is posted.. you now have an open invite and can probably figure out exactly how much time you have to peruse their belongings based on where they are “checked in.” Or, the best status message, “in Hawaii for a week!” shows them they have an entire week to scope the place out and pick the best time to walk in to steal your shit.
Everyone should furthermore appreciate this stupidity in light of how just a few short years ago everyone was worried about posting their LAST NAME online somewhere.. let alone addresses or phone numbers. Amazing how we went from being tentative to state our last name on a profile or IM account, for fear they could look us up in a phone book. <- remember those? I do, because they still freaking come to my house. But I digress, that is an argument for another day.
So we’ve moved from that mentality briskly into announcing every piece of contact information about ourselves and on top of that where we are at all times! Besides being robbed, if a dude (you might not even know them, maybe they found your pic online and liked what they saw) wants to stalk you, find you at a bar or whatever, you are paving the road for them. Nicely done.
I must be taking crazy pills here but I can’t be the only one who realizes how stupid this is right?! People gobble shit shit up as soon as the newest ’social networking app’ is released. Immediately adopting allows them to be on the forefront of whatever, and cooler cause they can say ‘oh I’ve been using it for months, its awesome you should check it out.’ Other reasons I can think of for using these apps in this manner include but are not limited to, bragging about what they are doing (I include myself amongst people guilty of this) and ‘everyone else doing it.’
I know there are probably more arguments against my point of view, so let me have it, I’m interested. (And “getting points” or “being a mayor” on foursquare does not count.)
Nothing in my online world is worse than those “25 Things” lists that have infected facebook indicating the inevitable downfall of this once somewhat exclusive, mighty social networking site. I remember MySpace way back when it was not horrible, well that’s a lie I don’t remember that. But what I mean to say is, people once used MySpace, then it became the lawless, ghetto wasteland that we know it as today. The influx of terrible applications, parents, adults, coworkers, young kids, convicted felons, struggling bands and stupid viral posts like the “25 Things” are what brought down MySpace and what has begun to destroy the usabililty, usefulness and not-being-annoying-ness of facebook.
“… interesting facebook story. Last night somebody (presumably in a dimly lit basement internet cafe in China) hacked Mary’s account and asked her friends (specifically, Mikey, who knew it was a scam) to wire her money in Africa (attached is his conversation). Pretty awesome, though it has proven an invaluable albeit unexpected lesson.
I sincerely hope, for your sake, that your travels to China don’t leave you in need of money, because none of us will believe you.”
February 3rd, 2009:
Mary
hi
7:32pmMichael
yo
7:33pmMary
How are you doing
7:33pmMichael
great! i became an uncle today!
7:33pmMary
Wooow
7:34pmMichael
my sister is adopting a child from Peru, and they got all their info today
how are YOU doing
7:34pmMary
Am ok
But not happy
7:35pmMichael
whats wrong?
7:35pmMary
One of my college need my help and i can’t assit her
7:36pmMichael
?
7:36pmMary
She need me to help her send some money and i don’t have enough on me
7:37pmMichael
oh man
that sucsk
do you need to borrow some cash?
7:37pmMary
Yea a lot
Yea can you help me on it
7:38pmMichael
yea absolutley
how much do you need
7:38pmMary
Well i don’t no how much you can help out
how much can you borrow me
7:40pmMichael
would the real Mary Connolly please stand up
7:41pmMary
Am here
7:43pmMary
Michael
talk to me
It was some one you were talking too
Am so sorry my box was hacked
7:44pmMichael
how much money do you need- i can bring it over tomororw
7:45pmMary
don’t come coz amn
not in
7:46pmMichael
ok when will you be home? i’ll come by this weekend with un-marked bills
7:48pmMary
Am out for the week end michael
7:48pmMichael
ok well when should i bring over all this cash?
there’s just so much of it
7:49pmMary
Are you pulling my leg’s micheal
7:49pmMichael
are you pulling mine? ” MARY ”
7:51pmMary
Nope am not
Seem you don’t be live me
7:52pmMichael
alright great
let’s do a wire-transfer
7:52pmMary
So how is your sisiter doing
7:52pmMichael
what is your account number
mine is : 7
7:52pmMary
It as been block am owing the bank some momey
7:53pmMichael
ok so how should we do this
7:53pmMary
Can you go to western union and send it
7:53pmMichael
no problem
7:54pmMary
That would be more easy for you
But you will have to send it to the person i want you to send it too
Micheal if you no you are playing wit me let me no ok
7:55pmMichael
no i am in. who should i send the money to?
7:55pmMary
It’s going to africa
Can you be able to send it there?
And i need you to send it now
7:57pmMichael
ok
i’ll just go to western union and transfer “money” to “africa”
they’ll know just what to do!
8:03pmMichael
well fake Mary, it was nice meeting you. Good luck in Africa and with your financial problems. take care now, bye bye then
I love when stuff like this comes up, I know I can be offensive, but I’m nowhere as public a figure as even a college football lineman is.. wait a minute.. I think I just got really sad. Well, if it is any consolation to myself or anyone else, he is in fact, an idiot:
Yes, Jimbo, you are right, Africa only has AIDS and nothing else at all. Also, you are dating a girl named Sunshine. Sounds about right. Go Florida!
“A great excuse to force the dildos that live below us to listen to “Monster Mash” through their ceiling until 5 am”
Come on out to Allston (the Salem of the Metro Boston Area) for the first ever 41 Coolidge Halloween Party. Perks will include:
* A guaranteed comfortable, giggly atmosphere due to steady stream of weed smoke billowing through our second-story windows from below
* A sure-to-be-fantastic array of variations on the classic ’slutty ____’ costume (i.e. devil/nurse/nun/Mother Teresa/Appellate Court Judge).
* Crimmins
* Every 5th Sarah Palin (or ‘Tina Fey playing Sarah Palin’) costume drinks free!
* Slurred, incoherent conversation and semi-rhythmic dance-movements after 1 am
The more socially acceptable websites that I spend my time with.
Rob on Facebook: Andy still stays away from it, Casey is almost ready to tentatively approach it, but myself like millions of others have fully embraced it since having the doors opened to it early in my college career.
Rob's Freeskier Profile: Need to work on hanging out here more but Dave persuaded me to join back in the opening days and it is a sweet site he put together.