Thanks to John for this depressing response to an email with regards to my upcoming birthday:

“Rob,

You’re going to be gross and old in less than 2 weeks. Don’t worry
though, ill be joining you in line for our AARP cards a week later.

Re: the 17th, I may be in NY state that weekend, but its not a def. If
not, ill be there with a bag of werther’s originals for you. You’re
old, so you like those, right?”

–Later Email–
“….Rob, for your birthday, I’m getting you a Rascal, you old dirty bastard.”